Flashing Lights

and a veiled threat from a cop.

I've been learning some difficult lessons. 

As I've mentioned before, I'm in the middle of a "divorce." I put that in quotations because we were common-law partners, not officially married. I spent 13 years with this guy, and we ended things almost 4 years ago.

Everything was in his name, and he had always made clear that what was his was his. There were 2 vehicles, so when I left, I was allowed to borrow the one until the settlement agreement was finalized or until he decided he wanted it back. There have been conversations over the past few years about him taking the car back—though he never followed through. 

Yesterday morning, I ran out to grab a couple of groceries. On my way to the store, I encountered a police SUV driving strangely. He would be behind me, then beside me, driving very slowly. I stopped at a red light in the lefthand turning lane, and the cop moved two lanes over to get behind me again. I thought it was weird, but I was beginning to assume that perhaps—he had gotten notification of something happening in the area—he may need to tend to.

The green arrow flashed, and I proceeded through the intersection. I barely had the wheels straightened when his lights flashed on. Since I was in the left-hand lane and to my right was a regular lane and a merging lane from another busy street, I pulled over to the left shoulder to get out of his way. I thought he was going to blow past me. He didn't.

Photo by Scott Rodgerson on Unsplash

He pulled up behind me, and I was thoroughly confused. I wasn't speeding or doing anything I knew would warrant being pulled over. Then I wondered if a tail light was out. I rolled the window down and waited to find out what the problem was.

The second he bent down to speak with me, my gut sank. He was rude, and to be perfectly honest, I questioned whether or not I was safe. 

He asked for my license, registration, and proof of insurance. The insurance and registration were in the glovebox: to ensure my safety-- I said as much—and indicated I would need to reach in there to get them. My immediate thought was he would draw his gun and feign a threat had I immediately reached into the glove compartment. (gut instincts—always listen to 'em) Annoyed, he spoke to me as if I were an idiot and told me to give them to him. I followed his instructions, and he returned to his vehicle. 

When he returned, he said the vehicle's registration expired in August 2023. I was overcome with shock. My ex had told me he renewed it online in June 2023. I explained the situation to the officer. He reiterated it had expired. He was going to give me a $324 ticket. He stood there staring at me, and I had no idea what to say. 

"I get the ticket, or the registered owner gets the ticket?" I asked to be sure I understood.

"The person operating the vehicle gets the ticket," he responded.

I sighed and said ok. It was what it was.

He continued to stand there and stare at me. 

"I could give you two tickets," he said

My eyebrows flashed up in surprise—I had no idea what the second ticket would be for.

"Oh? What is the other ticket for?"

"Failure to produce."

That would be an additional 200-and-something dollars, totaling nearly $600 in fines. I slumped in my seat. Shock. Anger. Fear. The contemptuous look on his face fed my intuitive fear that he was potentially dangerous.

"We can use our discernment." He began. "I could give you a ticket for failing to produce instead of driving with an expired registration. Cut you a break. Sometimes we do that. Cut people a break. This would be less money." He stared at me.

Since it sounded like he had more to say—I waited for him to continue. This perturbed him.

"Ok..." I finally piped up.

"Where are you going?"

"The grocery store, then home, but now I'm just going home. I'll be calling my lawyer and fill her in on everything." I looked him dead in the eyes so he would understand I would include whatever power trip he was pulling in my conversation with my attorney.

"You should just register the vehicle." He said in a bitchy tone. 

Here's where I probably looked at him like he was an idiot.

"I'm not the registered owner of the car—I don't think I can renew the registration?"

"$83 is less than hundreds of dollars." He responded

Still confused, I said, "If I'm not mistaken, I need a form from the registered owner (my ex-spouse) allowing me to act on his behalf, or he needs to be there with me to renew the vehicle. I'm pretty sure I can't do that on my own."

"You know I could also have the car towed and leave you here." He said.

Did this cop just threaten to leave me in a ditch in the middle of a multilane road?

"As I stated before, I was given incorrect information about the vehicle. I will take it home, park it, and contact my lawyer to get it sorted out."

There was another pregnant pause before he said, "I'm going to let you go with a warning. But it will only cost you $83 to register the vehicle."

Again, with the $83. I don't know what he was trying to pull—or if he honestly didn't know any better.

"I really appreciate it. Thank you. Like I said, I will drive it home, park it, and contact my lawyer."

"Ma'am. You know you're supposed to pull over to the right when you're being pulled over."

"Yes, but I didn't know you were pulling me over. I thought you needed to get past me, so I moved out of your way."

He sighed and shook his head, again rife with contempt.

"You're lucky you didn't get someone that would have you towed."

While that may be true, I still haven't fully settled from this interaction.